New Gladiators Anyone? You'll Have to Look to the Skies…

David Hartley shakes an angry metaphorical fist at Sky One’s possession of the new Gladiators… 

When I was fourteen I watched the first series of 24 on BBC1 and I, like many others (including my mum), was hooked. The various exciting exploits of Jack Bauer and his Counter Terrorism Unit thrilled me week by week, making it one of the first adult programmes that became my required viewing. I. Could. Not. Miss. An. Episode. And, no doubt, I'd probably fallen a little bit in love with Elisha Cuthbert.

The first series finished and already the second was underway in America with rumours of more guns, more action, more countering of terrorists, more Elisha and frankly I couldn't wait. And then, like an unseen ninja hiding in the rafters of my TV schedule, Sky came swooping down and, Shurikens blazing, snatched my favourite thriller (and favourite foxy blonde) from under my nose. Didn't they know what sort of psychological damage that does to a fourteen year old? I don't think I've ever quite got over the pain.

And now, history is striking in the same place, lightening is repeating itself and mixing up metaphors is my only viable response. That’s right, the new series of Gladiators is going to be on Sky instead of ITV and on a student budget the only sky I'll be looking at is the big grey expanse up above.

The new series sounds wicked, class, ace and mint (to use all the words in a ten - fourteen year old's vocab) with new Gladiators called Battleaxe, Destroyer and Oblivion and the triumphant return of old favourite events such as a revamped Eliminator, Hang Tough and Powerball. But come May, who will actually be watching it? Maybe the computer geeks who can find illegal downloads off some obscure internet site, but for the rest of us it will be more filling of time until we can get our grubby hands on the DVD (if there is one).

Unless of course you have Sky and if you do, I gracefully tip my hat in respect and ask for some spare change from your bulging wallets. These days, for me and my peers, it's all about Freeview and iPlayers, the much more affordable methods of TV. Sure, we don't get Gladiators or 24 but we do have channel Dave and Bid-Up TV and enough money left over for DVD boxsets at the end of the month. And we're not alone, figures show that Freeview is doing very well with sales reaching the 27 million mark last month, indicating that the service continues to thrive after overtaking Sky in subscriptions in June last year. Sky's executives remain adamant that they do not compete with Freeview but its continued popularity must be cocking a few eyebrows.

So take your Gladiators, I’ll wait for the DVD because, maybe, when it comes down to it, we all need a little more patience in our lives. Too much instant gratification makes us irritable and fidgety so-and-sos. So while the Sky subscribers can sit in all summer and watch Battleaxe and co., the rest of us can lie back, stare at the real sky and play the Duel in our patient and fertile minds…